Are You REALLY Depressed?
It’s the new public enemy No.1.
Judging by how many people are talking about it, struggling with it, and generally always feeling it.
What is it?
Depression!
If projected figures are to be truly believed and people’s symptoms fully trusted, it’s a scourge eating away at society like a cancer and acting just as deviously.
The worldwide depression statistics state that 1 in 6 members of the public will develop some form of depression or mental health issue in their lifetime and that we are 10 times more likely today to develop severe depressive conditions than we did in 1945.
I think the last one says it all – despite having more than ever before, and not being in a World war where people are dying in their millions, we are more unhappy and worried than ever.
Planet Depressed.
We’ve never had it so good; standards of living are at an all time high, health care more widespread than ever, old luxuries are now everyday trinkets, and modern technology serves millions of us with swanky mobile phones, funky computers, PC tablets etc.
Life has more within it than it’s ever had, yet the facts and figures point to the most unhappy souls there has ever been as anxiety, depression, and suicide are at record rates.
Why? Why are people so down when everything is on the up?
Perhaps because we’ve expanded our expectations and destroyed our community spirit.
Us humans simply demand more and more gorging ourself constantly. When yesterday something was special like power steering or Sat Nav’s in a car or having a netbook or 42in plasma TV, today it’s passe and old and outdated. We want newer and better and be at the leading edge.
We don’t want to be left behind or left out. So, as technology speeds up apace dolling out new device after new device, we’re killing ourselves to keep up to acquire the latest and greatest shiny thing.
A glitzy world of marketing backs this up. From cool gadgetry to big labels, must haves are now must gets, and those without stupidly fear that their one year old cell phone or non off the peg dress equates to being stuck in life or, worse still, a total failure.
The truth…the race to buy has led to the need to cry. Capitalism and the chase to purchase ‘what the Joneses have’ has directly contributed to higher levels of depression. If you chart the spread and growth of each since 1945, I bet you will see a clear correlation.
Plus, during the war years everyone pulled together, helping out, a true community, but today neighbours don’t speak, and people keep themselves to themselves. Those old style feel good elements are missing from the streets and our personal lives and we mourn that loss.
You are NOT depressed.
I’m going to hang it out on the line here!
A huge proportion of people ARE NOT depressed. Because it can be notoriously difficult to accurately diagnose, many people get lumped in the category when they are far from being depressed. It’s not like a broken leg or black eye that is clear for all to see.
Tons and tons of normal emotions get tacked onto depression and that’s a serious problem. Doctors are taking perfectly natural emotions and making them depressive tendencies and people are joining in in their bucket loads.
Here’s the litmus test. How often have you heard the stupid statement, “I feel depressed today”?
Most likely EVERY day from someone. They are not sad or mad, but they are crazy.
True, deep, clinical depression takes months and months of gloomy thoughts and negative outlook to develop…YOU CAN’T BE DEPRESSED GETTING UP IN THE MORNING!! I know because I suffered from it over the space of a year before the symptoms became that bad (and I felt suicidal as a result).
**** IMPORTANT – People are NOT depressed. They are just feeling down or sad or low in energy that day or merely frustrated at work or because their partner doesn’t want to move house or too busy for a love-in. Usual, always existing moods effecting morale.****
Beating depression
1) The first route to beating depression or never letting it develop in the first place, is to not wear its clothes.
DO NOT say, “I am depressed”. You are inviting it to take over your system and to infect you so that you actually start believing and acting as if you are truly depressed. You are artificially creating it.
You wouldn’t say, “I am gastroenteritis”, or “I am haemorrhoids”. Treat depression in the same manner.
2) Next is to be realistic – if tonight you are a bit flat or rather down in the dumps this week, realise it’s most likely a passing phase. A natural emotional lull in daily life not the beginning of major depression. Life will probably right itself in a few days or so or perhaps it’s just one issue getting you down that you need to sort or cease fretting over.
3) Finally, get perspective and enjoy yourself. In reality what’s ‘depressing’ you is something that in a few months or next year will have gone completely from your memory. Today’s worries, tomorrow’s forgotten events. It’s usually the way that what we over concern ourselves with is mere froth and bubble and not as grave as we really think.
Look at the big picture. Sure you may have work problems on your mind or your relationship not as fun as it once was but what about the rest of life? Do you have your health? Are there friends to enjoy being with or hobbies you like? And didn’t you do the very same thing 5 years ago winding yourself up over nothing and all turned out right in the end?
Exactly!! Let it all go, get out there and live, have fun, do what makes you happy, and remember…life’s too short!
You’re not depressed, you’re human!
I’m not saying people don’t suffer from depression. On the contrary, it’s a very nasty condition that can blight lives as I only too sadly found out for a few years.
But it’s not the everyday commonplace state that people just bandy around in sentences like, “I’ve been a bit depressed of late’. Absolute hogwash.
Sorry, but get a grip people!
Life is hard at times and challenges come our way on a regular basis but our responses, if they turn sad or disappointed, are evolution in action and being a human being. No more, no less.
Today you’re upset or low, tomorrow you may well be back on great form. End of!
Depression isn’t something you ever willingly want to open the door to in your life because it will ruin your mental home and your life like the worst squatter from hell.
The good news is that if it calls one day on a trick or treat focus on the treats and soon it may well leave you alone for a long time if not forever.
“Concern should drive us into action, not into depression”
Psychologist, Karen Horney
*** PLEASE NOTE- Depression is a major disorder so if you experience deep feelings of sadness, loss of appetite and poor sleeping patterns, strong melancholy and a very low negative outlook over a period of months, always seek professional medical help***
Did you get laid low by a bad attitude and thought you were depressed? How did you get out of the slump? Have you suffered from clinically diagnosed depression? How did you beat it? Or, what are your tips for tackling the blue days when they arise? Love to hear your thoughts and stories!
Image courtesy of pangalactic gargleblaster and the heart of gold.
-
get Real Simple People posts by email
and receive FREE ebook
Follow John
The gist of this essay is so far off the mark it’s troubling, almost infuriating. Depression is not “blue days” nor is it “a slump.” Categorizing it along those lines betrays the fact that the writer has no knowledge of what depression is or what it’s about. The disclaimer at the end of the essay contains the single nugget of wisdom on the entire page: “Depression is a major disorder so if you experience deep feelings of sadness, loss of appetite and poor sleeping patterns, strong melancholy and a very low negative outlook over a period of months, always seek professional medical help.” That is what depression is about and that is the approach it requires. The suggestion that depressed individuals merely need to “get a grip” is irresponsible, wrong and potentially dangerous.
Very highly charged comments George and I have to ask whether you fully ready the post? I clearly stated I had been clinically depressed and for a few years as well as being suicidal (and have written before on the blog about my decision to commit suicide one night) so I have experienced depression on all levels. What has been your experiences? Have you had direct connecction witn depression? As such simply criticising in this manner means you’re adding to the escalating problem and not actually helping with it at all.
Really great stuff. Great insights and information. I loved what you said about not claiming depression. I am such a believer that perception is reality and when we must be are careful about how we characterize things and what we choose to embrace. Great post.
Thank You Sibyl, while it’s an awful condition it’s not the kind that people need to be bandying around in throw away phrases and it’s our own emotions we could better in understanding. That way if depression truly does strike we will know all too well how real it is.
John, I really like how you handle this topic. Depression is a pretty massive subject and I appreciate how you both (1) shed light on the possibility that one is not depressed but rather believing they are and (2) you also acknowledge that it is a very real thing for some.
It is something hard to diagnose and it can come from a self-fulfilling prophecy of feeling down or empty – then focusing on those thoughts and feelings. Diet plays a big part in it too with sugar, high glycemic index foods, caffeine etc… Many, many times it’s a real option to fix this naturally without medication. However, in some situations depression is a matter of chemical imbalance and medications have worked well for people.
I really, really appreciate how you talk about the subject of depression and suggesting an alternative in how one see’s weather or not they are dealing with depression or perhaps something else such as their internal vision/attitude/perspective.
Clearly, I disagree with George’s perception of your post.
Aileen, you’ve captured a superb phrase here..”self-fulfilling phrophecy”. Many people tell themselves they are depressed and move towards it when they are merely a bit dispirited for a while and much nearer normal health than they believe. True depression sneaks up on you without you being aware until, kapow, after many months you realise you are in a massive slump. Love your comments and think you’re very wise indeed in your approach to this.
I too believe that many people who are diagnosed as depressed, really aren’t. I honestly think the big push is all about big pharma and big dollars. I really do. If you get fired from a job the doc wants to prescribe Zoloft. Do some deep research on anti-depressants and you’ll be alarmed.
So excited you did this post because I know it will make someone who may be battling what they think is depression and make them re-evaluate their situation.
Depression is serious and should be taken seriously…as should our health (from the toxins in the meds).
—–
I, like every other human experience times when I’m down and don’t feel up to taking on the world. These moments are always temporary, but in the moment, they feel like they’ll last forever. The challenge is always the fact that we really don’t know how long the feeling will last; and it feels like it will last forever. I can see how that fear of the unknown along with the downing mental state can make a person really feel like they are depressed.
Pediatricians find it common to prescribe MOST kids Ritalin, adult physicians just love to diagnose depression. Somethings up…if you ask me.
Thanks for putting this post together John.
Best to you!
One word you mentioned stands out for me, JK…”Temporary”. Depression takes time to weedle into our mind and body and spirit and is no temporary low feeling so it’s a superb definition word for self mis-diagnosis. Ask anyone suffering deeply through depression and they will tell you it’s most certainly not a brief here-today-gone-tomorrow condition.
But, you’re so right that GP’s and doctors push the tablets. I was once prescribed Tamazapam and took one tablet and felt like a zombie so binned the rest and lived to tell the tale. How on Earth was drugging me up helping me understand and deal with my problem? We need a) people to stop all simply deciding to be depressed and b) doctors to cease giving them all pills to keep them that way.
Magnificent comments JK with a strong, focused observation on the issue. I thank you for your continual high quality input and strength of purpose. You bring sense and order and wisdom every time.
I can see that is an important topic for you John, and that it’s close to your heart. I’m ‘lucky’ in the sense that I’ve never been diagnosed with depression, nor has anyone ever said to me “You’ve been really depressed lately”, nor have I ever felt depressed. But others go through life by wading through the motions. Life just doesn’t feel right.
If depression has become a serious issue for you, and it’s affecting your relationships, then I strongly suggest seeking professional aid. If left ‘untreated’, it can grow into a major issue. But if you wake up one day and you feel a little ‘blue’, then you can take steps yourself to cheering yourself up. There’s plenty of resources for this.
In the end, it’s important to gauge your level of depression by observing your actions and your thoughts, and your behaviour with other people. Ask others how you’ve been seeming lately. If the evidence starts to stack up, seek help.
Thanks for bringing this to light John
It is important to me Stuart because I see and hear so many people throwing the term around and using it without any understanding of the implications. They would never say, ‘I have cancer today’ for very good and respectful reasons and I just wanted to add some good ones of mine about depression. Be fair, be realistic, be sensible is my message. Appreciate your excellent adding to the debate Stuart
Hey John,
I also agree that depressing feelings are more than likely something that will pass in a day and not to focus to much on it.
I have found that for many depression starts with thoughts in which are not necessarily that harmful to our well being. It’s when the continual depressing thoughts start affecting our body and that sluggish miserable feeling sets in.
After that it can really be difficult to even smile. I have been fortunate enough to be able to overcome any debilitating diseases in my life including minor depression.
You speak correctly for me Justin that first people think on a downer and simply don’t stop, but the danger ramps us even more when they add to that speaking with self-defeating language and looking for, and finding, one negative piece of evidence after another about the world and their world, their life. It truly is a slippery slope!
Hi John,
You have pointed out some good steps here. Many people if they feel low in energy one day, they start saying “I’m depressed.” I hear you and we all see it often. The key is analyze the root cause for our depression, separate ourselves from it, and start focuing on the solution and what we really want to achieve. Things like meditation, visualization, exercising can help us in this process. Thanks for sharing John It was a great read
Yes Dia, yes indeed. But isn’t it far easier for people to complain, moan, take on the victim status, acting with self-pity or simply just support than actually ever delving into why they feel as low as they do for as long as they have? We are too sacred of self-enquiry and what we percieve we will find. Truth be told though; it’s not a form of therapy, it’s complete liberation!!
Great post John,
I agree with Jk. The word is over used and doctors need to take a look at what they are doing to people that are just having a bad day or week. It is all about money. They are handing out drugs to people like it is candy.(by the way doctors do get a kick back every time the write out a proscription).
Give it about 10 or 20 years if even that long and the signs of all these drugs being taken are going to start showing there face and it is all so someone can make money.
With all the advertising about depression, it just gives people an excuse for those bad days. They are probably just bored. Isn’t that the word that use to be used when we sat on the couch with nothing to do and couldn’t think of anything we wanted to do.
Again a great post John and I do hope many people take a look at it.
Blessing to you,
Debbie
Guess it’s a 2 way street Debbie – doctors won’t hand out pills in handfuls if people didn’t turn up in droves saying they’re depressed when they’re pretty much guaranteed not to be. Most depressed people will deny it or see it creep up on them over months and not turn up at the clinic after a week of stress like far too many do. The answer though, as you brilliantly state, isn’t about “handing out drugs..like it is candy”. That sums up exactly where we are with depression. Great comments and thank you so much for adding so much to the issue here.
Hi John,
First time reading your blog, but I love it and hope to be back often.
I’m a very optimistic person so I tend to echo a lot of what you are saying here. Depression is something I want to avoid like the plauge. I always look for the good in life and make the best out of whatever circumstances I am handed.
Your approach is very well done. It looks like you have several like minded friends who agree.
See you again soon.
Bryce
Hi Bryce, welcome to my blog, great to see you and I appreciate your warm sentiments. I think you hit it right on the nail – you are optimistic which should translate to depression being a low risk in your life. When we keep the scales tipped in our favour they may never tip back. Which is why I struggle with people who fail to see how they are instigating depression when they throw around negative phrases and ‘poor me’ langauge as I mentioned in the post. Good luck Bryce and keep coming back sharing your optomistic outlook on life.
Dearest John, can I just put an exception to this for when women get that awful monthly friend to show up and just mess up their systems (esp. when they refuse to take drugs to fix it)? Ok that was TMI and it’s been a rough emotional cycle for me the last 48 hours with absolutely no good reason. One spoiled girl! Everything is going well and I am one happy clam all the time and I agree with EVERYTHING you said here so my point is this: If things happen that are out of the ordinary character for you, look at the things that may be causing it and that way, you feel better already. Some women have a very tough time with their cycle but are otherwise happy people. So it’s not depression, it’s PMS. Ok, I am off my soapbox and I do love you, John!
thank you for indulging me 
!
Hello my great friend Farnoosh. Of course hormonal or bodily changes that affect the chemistry as you detailed are a given. As a man I can’t contemplate what PMS feels like but I have been on the end of it and I know women would chose never to experience it if they could as it’s one mega mood swinger. That’s part of human evolution, choosing to be depressed when normal emotions are at play are part of a daily delusion that millions are falling for. Why ever chose to be worse than you are by attaching crazy labels to yourself? Always happy to indulge you Farnoosh, just drop by and away you go!
Thanks for responding, John and yes, I do agree. It’s all about awareness and perspective. Great job with this post. I will be linking to it in the near future for sure!!
Thank you very much Farnoosh for spreading the non-depressed word. And keep coming back now!
I know, that right now I am overwhelmed. I can see how I could call it depression. There are too many things missing. I can still laugh, enjoy the waves at the beach, yet, when I get back in my cubby hole… yes, I am overwhelmed.
Too often this is when people head for the doctor, for the pills, the easy way out. I have learned to notice the difference as I was once stuck in a black hole that was like a bottomless pit. What got me out, was not the pills. They just caused more problems. I had to do it from within. I had to learn to recognize the negative thoughts… look them in the eye, and change them around. It took time, effort, lots of effort, but it worked.
The world does not always go the way we want it to. We are not always dealt the hand of life we wanted or expected. So… what is the saying? “Make lemonade out of a lemon!” Look at the glass as half full and not half empty.
Hello Barbara. I am truly sorry to hear that you are in this position but I want to thank you so much for adding your comments as you will show many people precisely what I’m referring to. Right now you have a flood of emotions crashing on your shore but you are aware that it’s merely a period of ‘overwhelm’ (a lovely definition I must say) that you will work through. By choosing, instead, to term it depression means you begin to drown in all the feelings and move into a darker space. You, on the other hand, are showing strength and a desire to get back to a better place inside. You are an inspiration here!
hello john
how are you?
The article came alive like you were giving a speech while i was reading it.
It’s so true people often confuse daily struggles, stress, frequent upsets with depression and i appreciate you clearly distinguish between the two factors.
While i acknowledge clinical depression, i think (i may be wrong) some people use the term/word as an opportunity to label their current state of mind or stress.
You’ve given useful tips on dealing with the affairs of life that tend to weigh us down which we may loosely tag as depression and also emphasized the importance of seeking professional help if one is currently going prolonged bouts of sadness, moodiness, esteem issues, negative thoughts etc.
thanks for sharing.
Take care and enjoy the rest of the day
p.s. i am still waiting for matt to send me the original file of the magazine because my link has expired. as soon s i get it, i will send it to you.
I like your stance Ayo – people are mis-labeling themselves and dangerously so. We are often weighed down by life but these normal pressures aren’t depression suddenly appearing – that takes time. What we need to do is to take time to realise this. Prolonged pain and emotions, as you rightly say, are another matter. And I appreciate your efforts on the magazine front – I owe you breakfast!!
hey John
that’s so true, it became a habit to say “i am depressed when something goes wrong”
i liked your post so much
Depression has become an obsession hence it’s on the lips as much as the mind Farouk. But lower periods don’t equal depressed futures so why do people convince themselves otherwise?