Self-Confidence And The Ten Day Triumphs Exercise
Your last ten days holds the key to unlocking all the self-confidence you could want.
To living with pride and satisfaction and feeling great about who you are.
Yeah I know, you probably think I’m nuts or on something.
Ok hear me out, because below I will explain why plus also let you into the secret exercise I use with clients that helps them re-discover there inner self-belief through simply scanning their most recent diary or re-calling a few weeks events.
Are you ready to get some confidence back?
Ace, let’s go for it!
Confident people know what they are good at. They have a true idea of their talents and abilities, but also, crucially, they can view their efforts and see them as competent and valuable even if they’re not earth shattering or world record breaking.
They are self-aware.
For you this confidence begins in being aware that you make a difference everywhere you go and in everything you do and say. The key word being ‘every’.
Every thing you are touches others and has an effect every single time!
Every day something you say inspires another person. The clothes you wear make a statement someone else can’t miss or even feels attractive. The way you work or what you do while you work sends a message to others or inspires them in some manner like sparking a dream or an idea. And simply your persona, your presence, can change another person’s life.
A Self-Confidence Story
I used to be a professional tennis coach. For a few years I set up a parks coaching scheme to reach out to the community providing free rackets and low cost tutoring to get youngsters into sport and give them somewhere to be. It attracted heaps of kids and was hugely rewarding for both them and me.
Ten years later I’m in a pub on a night out for a friend’s stag night. All night an older guy in the corner has been giving me the eye and then chatting to a few others with him. I felt a bit freaked but carried on trying to ignore it all. Towards the end of the evening I went to the bar to buy some drinks and bam, suddenly he was there beside me.
He said, “Are you John Sherry, the tennis coach?” (by now I had retired from coaching). I told him I am and had been to which he grabbed my hand saying, “I want to shake your hand and thank you. Ten years ago you taught my son Peter tennis in the park. He was a shy kid who was bullied and had no self-confidence until he met you. He loved going to tennis because you always encouraged him and told him he was good and improving. You gave him attention and told him that he was a smashing little player – he always remembered that, ‘a smashing little player”.
“Until he met you he’d been struggling at school but after that he got great grades and is now at a top college and is about to graduate. He told me if he ever saw you again to thank you for changing his life. I want to thank you as his father for changing his life”.
It is a night and a conversation I have never forgot and never will for the rest of my life.
That’s what YOU can do for others by simply doing what you do and being who you are.
The Ten Day Triumphs Exercise
I now want to introduce you to your own triumphs and the confidence they can give you in a simple exercise.
You are going to review the last ten days. Not the last year or decade, just the last ten days. That will be sufficient.
I want you to take it day by day. It’s best to work through this on paper (you can do it mentally but the effect isn’t nearly so prolific), so get a jotter or ten pieces of blank paper, one for each day.
Now, on day one I want you to re-call every action, conversation, job etc you did. Include shopping for food for the family or presenting a report on sales at work or playing squash against Pete.
Next to every entry now consider how they have been successful, helpful, important to others, and most notably, what good and great things they say about you.
Example: Played squash with Pete - This keeps me fit which keeps me healthy, my kids love me playing so I stay fit and alive and around for a long time in their life. It also teaches them that sport is good for you and for staying well. Squash also brings out my competitive abilities as I’ve been promoted three leagues in the last year so I’m fast improving. Pete also loves to play as he’s in a high powered job full of stress and his recent divorce has upset him a lot so it helps him forget his problems and have a good time as we have a drink and a chat afterwards, and so on.
Work through each of the ten days one at a time.
List every minor or major action or activity you did for the whole ten days no matter how insignificant you may first think them i.e. bringing your wife coffee in bed or helping the kids with homework. Beyond you they are positively shaping other people’s world’s and lives and this is down to you. You are THE difference!
Be Proud to be YOU!
This exercise may take an hour or two but it can change your whole outlook on life MAJOR TIME!
It will put in front of you all the influence and inspiration and love you give to people and how, every day, you are a huge presence in their life. One friend of mine used to get an early bus to work and he always felt brighter when a neighbour he didn’t even know or had ever spoken to, would drive past going the other way flashing his lights and waving at him. It set him up for the day.
YOU do that. You touch and uplift people and teach them and guide them and leave a trail of love wherever you go. Recognise it at last and be proud.
Check your last ten days and you will soon see the triumphs you are constantly making and all the confidence they are giving, which prove beyond doubt how wonderful it is to be the awesome, amazing YOU!
YOU are the difference in the world around you, for ten days and a lifetime, all the time.
What gives you confidence? Who inspired belief in yourself just by being themselves? Share with me your own self-confidence stories.
Image courtesy of Dave Dehetre